From ‘eldest wife’ in
Silver Spoons Sterling
Shackles (名媛望族) to a wretched, sickly mother in
Missing You (幸福摩天輪) to an honorable judge
in
Friendly Fire (法網狙擊), veteran
actress Mary Hon (韓馬利) has been a ‘common fixture’ in many of TVB’s recently
aired TV series.
During a recent interview with Yang Cheng Evening Paper,
Mary Hon not only chats with our reporter about the lessons she learned in her
37 year acting career, she also shares with us her advice on maintaining a happy
marriage.
YC = YCWB reporter
MH = Mary Hon
Towards ‘Acting’Mary Hon started in the industry
working for Rediffusion Television [ATV’s predecessor] back in 1972. Even though
she had graduated from RTV’s acting class at the time [
TN: one of
her classmates that same year was veteran actor Damian Lau (劉松仁)], she actually did not
go into acting right away – rather, she joined the dance department and worked
as a background dancer for 2 years. It wasn’t until Mary joined TVB a few years
later that her acting career actually started to take flight. In 1975, Mary
participated in her very first TV series: famed producer Wong Tin Lam (王天林)’s
wuxia classic
Luk Siu Fung (陸小鳳) –
despite this being her first foray into acting, Mary was already cast in the
lead female role in the series opposite none other than her acting class
‘partner’ Damian Lau. Around the same time, she was also chosen to co-host TVB’s
popular, highly-rated entertainment news program
K-100 alongside ‘golden host’ Ivan Ho (何守信).
Several decades later, Mary Hon is still active in the HK television
industry, participating in one series after another, and sometimes even
appearing on HK audiences’ TV screens in multiple series at the same time! Her
performance as Damian Lau’s eldest wife in last year’s anniversary series
Silver Spoons Sterling Shackles
was well-received by audiences and her cameo roles as 2 distinctly
different mothers in this year’s recently aired series
Missing You and
Friendly
Fire both received good feedback from audiences.
YC: In
both
Missing You and
Friendly Fire, you played a mother who
reunites with her long lost son. When filming both series, did you feel the
story idea sounded similar?
MH: I just thought ‘oh, what a coincidence!’
It originally wasn’t much of a problem, it’s just that both series ended up
airing at the same time and therefore the reunion scenes in each occurred only
1-2 days apart – that’s why a lot of audiences felt it was a bit odd. But hey,
no big deal – after all, [veteran actor] Law Lok Lam (羅樂林) also ‘died’ 5 times
in the same day, right? (Laughs).
YC: With the many characters you’ve
portrayed over the years, there are bound to be some that are similar in nature.
Is it tiring to portray similar characters like that?
MH: Being with the
company so many years, I’ve portrayed every character imaginable: drug addict,
street vendor, rich classy lady, evil villain, etc….of course there was a
bottleneck period when I would ask myself why I’m playing the same types of
characters over and over again. Is it because I’m only capable of playing these
types of characters? But even if the characters and story concept are similar,
there will still be distinct differences – for instance, with the ‘mother
reuniting with long lost son’ character, one of the mothers is a respected judge
while the other is an ordinary woman suffering from Alzheimer’s – therefore, the
method of portraying these 2 characters will definitely be different. To make
each character come across different to audiences, that is not the
scriptwriter’s issue -- it’s the responsibility of the actor portraying the
character(s).
YC: Recently, there have been many TVB artists who left
to join rival stations – have you thought about changing your work
environment?
MH: Back during my younger days, I also went through that
‘poaching’ period – there were TV stations in Malaysia and Singapore that had
approached me in the past trying to get me to join, but back then, I felt that
my love relationships were more important – since I didn’t want to leave my
other half behind, I rejected the offers. Now that I’m older, I feel that
affinity with the company is very important – after all, I’ve worked for TVB so
many years already and the company treats me relatively well. In this area,
Damian Lau had a huge influence on me – he once told me that he ‘grew up’ at
TVB, so when the company is facing a crisis, he should stay and help them fight
the battle. I feel that what he said makes a lot of sense.
YC: Back
in the day, when you were at the peak of your career, you chose to get married.
Looking back now, do you feel any regrets?
MH: I’m not the type of person
who proactively fights for things – filming series, becoming a host, etc., all
of that was arranged for me by others. Popularity would have come easily back
then, but yet I didn’t put much effort into grasping it and because of that, a
lot of opportunities were lost – looking back now, it was a bit regrettable.
That’s why nowadays, I always tell the younger generation that they need to
constantly enrich themselves and when an opportunity comes along, grasp on to it
– every character you get is a good opportunity to express yourself, so don’t
slack off just because you feel the role is insignificant or there’s little
screen time. You never know – maybe a producer happens to watch that performance
and it leaves an impression on them so they decide to seek you out next
time.
YC: In the past few years, you’ve been getting heavier roles
and the feedback from audiences has been pretty good. Any hopes of getting an
award?
MH: Of course I would want to grasp the opportunity if it were to
present itself, however as actors, we’re very passive and things often aren’t
within our control – you need to have a good script, good director, good actors
to collaborate with, etc….otherwise, even if you’re hugely talented, things
still might not work out. Sure, awards are a source of encouragement, but
shouldn’t be the main reason for doing our jobs. Do your job well first, then
the awards will come later – you shouldn’t wait until you get an award to start
doing your job well.
Towards
‘Pressure’In the series
Silver
Spoons Sterling Shackles, Mary Hon played the role of ‘eldest
wife’, but in real life, she has always played the role of ‘Big Sister’. Two
years ago, the pressures of work and life caused Mary to develop anxiety
disorder – luckily, through the support and encouragement of friends and family,
she was able to overcome this difficult period.
YC: Is it true that
you once developed anxiety disorder because of too much stress?
MH: That
happened 2 years ago – perhaps the stress that had accumulated over the years
became too great and so it just broke out all at once. When I was busy with
work, I didn’t realize I had such an illness – that time, it happened to be my
rest period from filming and that’s when the problems surfaced. Each time the
anxiety attacks occurred, my whole body would shake and break out in a sweat..
at times I would even have difficulty breathing and couldn’t sit down – I would
have to stand up and take deep breaths repeatedly. I was afraid to stay home
alone and had to go walk around outside to take in fresh air; even something as
simple as taking a shower was difficult because each time I closed the shower
door I felt like I was going to suffocate. Sometimes, I would even hallucinate
and hear voices whispering in my ear: ‘Mary Hon, you are so useless, you should
just go die!’ or ‘Mary Hon, you’re so crazy, no one is going to care about
you!’
YC: How long did it take for you to overcome this
suffering?
MH: Luckily, I discovered this illness early and was able to
seek proper treatment. At first, I went to the hospital to get it checked out,
but the doctors there were very irresponsible – they said that I was healthy
physically so probably just imagining things. Later on, I was talking to a
friend of mine who happened to be a psychologist and she told me all those
things were symptoms of anxiety disorder – she taught me how to treat it and a
few months later, I was well again. I’m very grateful for the group of friends
that kept me company during that time and helped me get through it. Even though
the doctor prescribed medication for me to take, I don’t want to constantly rely
on medicine – now, whenever I’m unhappy, I pray.
YC: After this
experience, did it help you better understand how to balance work and personal
life?
MH: All along, I’ve always had high standards for myself – if I
didn’t meet those standards, I would get upset at myself. Plus at home, I’m the
big sister, so I’m used to always being the one who takes care of others –
whenever someone had a problem, I would take it upon myself to help them resolve
it, so over time, it caused the burdens on my shoulder to get heavier. After
this experience [anxiety disorder], I realized that good health is just too
important. What’s the use of earning so much money if it’s at the expense of
your health?
Towards
‘Marriage’Mary Hon has been married 3 times: at 21 years old,
she married a high school classmate of hers who also worked as a director at TVB
– unfortunately, a ‘rumor’ ended the marriage a few years later. In 1981, she
married veteran actress Fung Bo Bo (馮寶寶)’s elder brother Fung Kat Lung, however
the marriage only lasted 6 years – the unhappiness and pain of that marriage
almost brought Mary to the point of suicide. It wasn’t until 1989 that Mary
finally met her life companion – her current husband, TVB voice actor To Yin Gor
(杜燕歌) with whom she has been together for the past 23 years.
YC: Your
husband To Yin Gor recently switched from working behind-the-scenes [as a voice
/ dubbing actor] to acting in front of the cameras – were you the one who
sparked his interest in acting?
MH: Actually, all along, a lot of people
have been telling him to try acting in TV series, but because he is used to
speaking Mandarin and filming series requires speaking in Cantonese, he was
afraid to try it. It wasn’t until producer Lau Ka Ho (劉家豪) invited him to play a
Mandarin-speaking triad leader in last year’s
Witness Insecurity (護花危情) that he got a chance to try
acting in front of the camera. Then later on, producer Jonathan Chik (戚其義) gave
him a role as a storyteller in his series
Beauty
at War (金枝欲孽2) – after both those experiences, he started to
develop an interest in acting, so the company signed a new contract with him –
hopefully he will be able to balance his work as an actor and voice dubbing
artist simultaneously. I’m very happy that he is able to find a sense of
satisfaction in acting because I feel that as a man, it’s important for him to
find his own position and confidence – I support him completely!
YC:
Do you usually give him pointers and advice on acting?
MH: Definitely
not! Unless he specifically asks me for my advice on acting, otherwise I don’t
want to place any unnecessary burden on him. Since I’ve been acting for so long,
he of course already feels that he has less experience than me in this area – if
I try to ‘teach’ him too, it will hurt his confidence!
YC: Outside,
you are the ‘big sister’, but when you’re at home with your husband, do you go
back to being the ‘little woman’?
MH: For me, family is the most
important and my husband is the number one priority in my life. Of course, as
with any marriage, certain things that are a matter of principle can’t be
compromised, but if it’s a harmless matter, I let him make the
decision.
YC: After so many years of marriage, you two still have a
very sweet relationship – can you share your ‘secret’ to maintaining such a
happy marriage?
MH: My husband is from Beijing and immigrated to
Australia in his teens, whereas I was born and raised entirely in Hong Kong –
growing up in different environments, our backgrounds and personalities were
very different, so of course it took a long period of time for us to assimilate.
The first few years of our marriage, there were a lot of conflicts and when we
were unhappy, we wouldn’t speak to each other – this is actually very unhealthy
for the relationship because if there’s ‘trash’ in your heart and you don’t
clean it out, it will fester over time and eventually cause irreparable damage.
Later on, I felt that our paths were starting to stray further and further
apart, so we sat down and talked through it – we realized that we couldn’t
continue like this and had to figure out a way to resolve the problems.
Eventually, we learned to communicate better with each other – now whenever we
encounter differences in opinion, we talk it over calmly and try not to say
things that we’ll regret later. And if we happen to say things out of anger that
we don’t actually mean, we always make sure to apologize to each other
afterwards.
YC: Having been married before, did it help you cherish
each other even more?
MH: When I was young, I thought that as long as the
person had the right qualifications, I just had to marry him, but then after we
married, we realized it wasn’t a good fit, so ‘divorce’ was the only way to
resolve the issue. In my second marriage, I was too passive and basically let
him make the decisions on everything, to the point that I lost all sense of self
and couldn’t even think on my own – this actually put a lot of pressure on him
and caused problems in the marriage.
Now with my current marriage, I
approach it more rationally. We met at a Christian Artistes Fellowship gathering
and actually took some time getting to know each other before we started dating
– it’s different from the youth nowadays who start dating almost right after
they meet and then start becoming intimate after knowing each other for only a
few days. All marriages will encounter problems, but the important thing is to
be willing to communicate and not use divorce as an excuse to resolve the issues
-- if things go bad and you just ‘throw’ the marriage away, how many times are
you able to do that? I’ve seen some couples where when they get married, their
partner is worth 120%, but then when it gets to the point of divorce, they
suddenly become ‘enemies’. I feel that if you make the decision to go down the
path of marriage, then you absolutely have to learn to safeguard and nurture it.
Source: Yang Cheng Wan Bao (Yang Cheng Evening
Paper)
Translated by: llwy12@
http://asianfanatics.net
