MingPao interviews Ada Choi: Life in a Show
Saturday, May 15, 2010
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In front of the camera, Ada Choi uses 7 emotions – joy, anger, sadness, fear, love, madness, and desire – to inject life into the characters she portrays, which has led to many accolades as well as a TV Queen award. In real life, it can be said that Ada’s life experiences parallel that of a TV series – and more. At the young age of 17, after taking 3rd place (2nd runner up) in the Miss Hong Kong Beauty Pageant, she accepted an interview with a Taiwan media outlet, using her broken Mandarin to introduce herself: “禾絲叉燒芬（我是蔡少芬）”, which became a “classic” joke for a long time. Over 2 years ago, Ada decided to marry mainland actor Max Zhang, therefore becoming a ‘ChongQing bride’ [TN: Max’s hometown in China]. Today, grateful joy and nurturing love can constantly be seen on her face.Joy – Best Quality Marriage
In January 2008, Ada married ‘Best Quality Male’ Max Zhang. After a 5 year courtship, which the couple kept low-profile, Ada one day decided to ‘set precedence’ by personally writing up a marriage announcement and faxing it to the media; in the announcement, she used the words ‘Best Quality’ to describe her soon-to-be husband Max. Today, 2 years later, she says: “I married a husband who loves me a lot, is very caring and considerate towards me, and takes good care of me. As the days go by, he has become more and more mature and confident in himself; and of course, he is more handsome than before – just like I consider myself more beautiful than before…haha. I’m constantly saying to him: ‘Wow, you are so cute, I can’t help but love you to death!’”
Another ‘warm story’ that occurred prior to their marriage: one time, Max got sick after eating cold crab and had to go vomit in the bathroom. He didn’t want Ada to see him that way and worry, so he would not let her follow him to the bathroom. When she found out, she knocked unceasingly on the bathroom door until he let her inside. In the end, she affectionately patted his back with one hand while he vomited and helping to clean up the mess with the other. Willing to face difficulty together -- perfectly demonstrates the qualities of a good wife.
Ada’s status as ‘Mrs. Zhang’ is like a ‘safety net’ for her, giving her a feeling of security and protection. Another happy story that Ada often tells (and is pretty proud of) occurred after she was married, while she was on an evangelism trip to the U.S. One day, when she was browsing at a mall, a good-looking American man approached her and wanted to invite her on a date. Ada held up her hand to show him her wedding ring – he realized he didn’t have a chance and went on his way, but not before telling her that the man who married her must be a good man and is definitely very lucky! Afterwards, Ada called her husband (long distance) and proudly reported the encounter.
Ada: “I am no longer all alone by myself – in addition to my husband, I also have a lot of family who love me dearly. My in-laws [Max’s parents] love me as though I were their own daughter, especially my father-in-law, who is an athletic instructor and doesn’t usually speak much – yet when we get together, we talk non-stop. In contrast, when he is with his 2 sons [Max and his brother], the 3 of them become ‘mutes’. With my mother-in-law and sister-in-law, [the wife of Max’s brother], there are also endless topics to talk about, so when we get together, the atmosphere is always filled with liveliness and excitement. My in-laws miss me a lot and are constantly reminding Max to take good care of their ‘Fen Fen’ [Ada’s Chinese name].”
She continues: “Some men view marriage as a ‘project’ – after getting married, they ‘close out the file’ so that they can ‘start’ on new projects. I’m very fortunate, because Max says that marriage is like a ‘semi-colon’ rather than a ‘period’ because after a ‘semi-colon’, the ‘sentence’ continues on. When we first got married, we did talk about having children and feel we are ready emotionally. However, having children should not consume a couple’s life entirely – even after being parents, it is important to have personal time as well. Even though I have long-term issues with my back, no need for everyone to worry – the doctor says that it won’t affect my ability to have children. In the future, if I do become pregnant, I may consider ‘announcing’ it in a similar way that I did my marriage.”
Anger – Mutual Respect
Ada and Max are undoubtedly a loving couple, however as with all couples, there are times when they argue. At times (though rarely), the arguments can get pretty serious, like the one instance when Max couldn’t stand it anymore and threatened to send Ada to the airport with her luggage in tow. Arguing is something that all couples go through and for these 2, it’s something that helps them grow stronger as a couple.
Ada: “I used to be very headstrong, always thinking that I know everything and unwilling to listen to others, which made it difficult for my husband. But now, I’ve changed – I understand that in all matters, I cannot just think about myself and do whatever I want, rather it’s necessary to keep the communication open. So now, we discuss everything. Mutual respect and support for each other is a necessary lesson that all couples need to learn.”
Sadness – Crying Together
Both Ada and Max are devout Christians, but even with God’s grace and blessing, the couple still occasionally encounters difficult situations that they need to face and resolve together. One time, Ada was very upset over the loss of a close, ‘sister-like’ friendship due to a misunderstanding. She normally does not like to cry in front of others, (except when acting, of course) – not even in front of her husband -- so she locked herself in the bedroom and started sobbing uncontrollably. Max was worried about his wife and after forcing his way into the bedroom, he asked her: “Why are you afraid to cry in front of me?” Hearing this made Ada cry even harder; in the end, Max sat with her, prayed with her, and even cried with her. Looking back, the ‘sadness’ of that day is now a sweet sweet memory for them.
Fear – Nightmare of Unfaithfulness
Ada: “A description of a nightmare I’ve had: I see my husband in bed with another woman and without even seeing clearly the face of the woman, I am crying uncontrollably and yelling ‘Why are you unfaithful to me?’…..then, I’m jolted awake.”
Now, don’t misunderstand – the above is only a description of a nightmare that ‘Mrs. Zhang’ [Ada] had one time. Sometimes, when she doesn’t have much to do, she would browse the internet – one time, she saw a posting that said if a man had to choose which woman to sleep with -- between his wife and his mistress – he would always choose the latter [the mistress]. Reading this caused Ada to lament the act of unfaithfulness in a marriage and hence ‘release’ her worries in the nightmare.
Ada has always been a brave person. Even if she encountered a fearful situation, she would combat it with prayer and ask her God to help her overcome it. So what is she afraid of then? The one scene in the series "Fly With Me" where she is hanging by a wire over the streets of Hong Kong’s Central, pretending to ‘fly’ onto a bridge. The streets were not cleared, so hanging by a wire up in the air, Ada could see all the cars driving back and forth below her – if something disastrous were to happen and she fell to the ground, she would die for sure. After filming this scene, Ada was so scared that she sat in a corner and cried.
Love – ‘Sappy’ Romance
Looking through Ada’s weibo (microblog) postings, it is not difficult to find many pictures of her and husband Max holding hands and basking in each other’s presence. One of the postings even reads ‘Two hands in love, so do you feel like throwing up?’ – during the interview, just for fun, the reporter responds back to the weibo posting with: ‘Yes, I really want to throw up!’ Like most couples, after getting married, Ada and Max call each other by the titles ‘husband’ and ‘wife’, however Ada revealed that prior to their marriage, she was always Max’s ‘guai guai’ [good good] and he was her ‘yu yu’ [fish fish]. Why ‘fish fish’? Because Max likes to squish his lips together like a fish and make a ‘BuBuBu’ noise to make Ada laugh – the ‘sappiness’ is enough to give someone goosebumps!
Though the 2 of them are constantly doing silly things to make each other laugh, there are many ‘serious’ times as well. Due to their busy work schedules, flying in an airplane is a common mode of transportation for this couple. Prior to getting on a plane and after getting off one, they have a habit of texting a short message to each other – like a ‘pact’ of life and death. Ada leaves the message: “If something happens to me, don’t be too sad, because I will be with my Father in Heaven.” Max’s message: “If I leave this world, you must find someone else to take care of you.” Once they safely reach their destinations, they text each other again: “Ha ha ha! You can’t find someone else now! You will be in the palm of my hand forever!” A typical ‘date’ for this couple consists of getting up at 6am in the morning, taking their beloved dog and a Bible, then going for a walk by the creek that runs near their house.
In addition to the love from her husband, Ada also enjoys the love of her own parents. Though her parents are divorced and she once had a rocky relationship with them, she reveals that things have changed a lot. During the interview, Ada mentions her father often and indicates that whenever both she and her husband are out of town, they entrust their beloved dog to her father to take care of. As for her mother, they are also very close and she has taken on the responsibility of taking care of her, just like a loving daughter should.
Desire – Husband’s Career to Take Flight
Desire is a catalyst for improvement. When Ada and Max first married, the criticisms surrounding the huge disparity between their popularity and money-making abilities in the entertainment industry seemed endless. However, they faced the challenges together.
Ada: “How much money someone makes does not represent that person’s worth or value. With my status as ‘Max’s wife’, of course I will hope for my husband’s career to be successful and for him to get more recognition in the industry. However, my desire for his career to take flight won’t add any ‘pressure’ for him because he is already a very ambitious, hard-working, confident, and capable person. Actually, he is in China right now shooting for director Wong Kar Wai’s new film. This is indeed a great opportunity – even with me being in the industry over 20 years, I never got a chance to work with such a renown international director!”
Ada continues: “I like acting; I’m an actress, not a celebrity. Seeing the likes of Louise Lee and Kara Hui still active in the industry, really gives me a lot of hope. In addition to doing series, I also hope to do a film someday – even if it is only a small cameo, as long as the character will be ‘fun’ to play, I would be interested. I also don’t mind filming together with Max as husband and wife in a series or movie, even if we have to do a kissing scene. For us, we’re not worried about revealing our personal lives because if we were to do a kissing scene, it would be different from how we normally kiss anyway. Once I get into my character, I am a completely different person, so it would not affect my personal life.
Madness – Sticking to Her Principles
In terms of work, Ada refuses to participate in series/films related to ‘ghosts’ or ‘spirits’. As far as intimate scenes go, she of course has done some ardent kissing scenes and even a few bed scenes, but that is the limit. At one point, there were plenty of opportunities – working with Stephen Chow, Jet Li, Francis Ng, plus the chance to be nominated for an award or two in the Best Actress or Supporting Actress categories. But due to her principles, she politely rejected one offer after another, thereby losing many opportunities. She explains: “These principles don’t have anything to do with whether I am a ‘wife’ or not – I’m just not able to get past my own conscience when it comes to these matters.”
Conclusion – Funny Jokes
Back when Max and Ada started dating, he already pointed out that Ada herself is like a ‘funny joke’ because she is always making people laugh – it’s what attracted her to him in the first place. During the interview, Ada did what she does best: relay many of the experiences that she and her husband went through in the form of funny jokes. Once such instance: They were heading to the airport for a trip to Japan for vacation, but remembered the wrong flight information and departure times. In order to ensure that they make it in before the gate closes, Max suggested that Ada pretend to be ‘airport lady’ and roll through the gate just before it closes – causing Ada to double over in laughter. Max’s ‘odd’ Cantonese pronunciation is also another ‘funny’ aspect of their relationship; his “災難片” becoming “齋爛片” is already enough to make Ada laugh all day just thinking about it.
With this ‘perfectly matched’ couple, it’s hard not to applaud their great relationship!
Source: Ming Pao: Part 1, Part 2
Translation: llwy12 @ AsianFanatics
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Ada Choi 蔡少芬
